Top Ten Flight of the Conchords Songs #6

Flight of the Conchords

Mrs B and I first discovered Flight of the Conchords in late 2009 when my wife received a box set for Christmas. Entering 2010 we immediately indulged ourselves with the adventures of the New Zealand folk duo, Jemaine (Jemaine Clement) and Bret (Bret McKenzie), who are in New York trying to win an American audience after limited success back home i.e. the second most popular folk group in New Zealand. It took about two episodes but we were soon hooked and looking back now just over a year later it seemed an appropriate time to share our ten favourite Flight of the Conchords songs. If you’ve never seen the show you are in for a treat my friends.

You Don’t Have to be a Prostitute (Series 2 – Episode 2: The New Cup)

In one of the best episodes of Flight of the Conchords Bret (Bret McKenzie) decides to buy a cup for $2.79 as he usually shares one with Jemaine (Jemaine Clement). A few weeks later their cheque for a phone bill bounces as they are short by $2.79. They are charged an overdraft fee which causes their cheque for the gas bill to bounce and the two musicians are left without power. They beseech Murray (Rhys Darby) for emergency funds but he advises them he has invested it all in a Nigerian businessman Nigel Saladu (Michael Potts) who has promised a massive return. Believing it to be a scam Jemaine and Bret begin selling items including funky straws and even their guitars leaving them to sing and play air guitar at performances and having to make guitar sounds themselves. Out of desperation they turn to male prostitution but have no success. Jemaine is later sent to a part of the city where he is told he can get good business. Meanwhile Bret learns from Murray that the Nigerian businessman has come through for them and has paid a massive sum of money, clearing all their debts. Bret heads out into the streets to save Jemaine and so begins the song “You Don’t Have to Be a Prostitute.”

Dave says:

Something of a tribute to The Police’s “Roxanne” this follows a similar structure with Bret informing Jemaine he ‘can say no to being a man whore, a male gigolo.’ Bret takes to the streets armed with a guitar while we are given amusing shots of Jemaine trying to get business, standing around in his underpants that are too tight and a vest! There’s even shots of him doing some pole dancing as well. I’m sure Mrs B agreed to this song being in the list purely for the sight of Jemaine but for me it’s just a great tune and the aftermath when Bret finds Jemaine in a hotel with a client and the police arrive is absolutely hilarious.

Mrs B says:

Little does Mr B know I have bought him a pair of those hotpants for Valentine’s Day! But seriously, I love this song mostly because of the fantastic episode it’s in. As Bret and Jemaine prove, there’s a thin line between a new cup and prostitution! From Jemaine’s sexy pants to Bret’s declaration about wearing the giant condom, I defy anyone to watch this and not find themselves aching with laughter.

Top Ten so far:-

6) You Don’t Have to Be a Prostitute

7) Cheer Up, Murray

8) Leggy Blonde

9) Think About It

10) Business Time

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Dave Brown

I was born in Barnsley, South Yorkshire, England and have always been a bookworm and enjoyed creative writing at school. In 1999 I created the Elencheran Chronicles and have been writing ever since. My first novel, Fezariu's Epiphany, was published in May 2011. When not writing I'm a lover of films, games, books and blogging. I live in Barnsley, with my wife, Donna, and our six cats - Kain, Razz, Buggles, Charlie, Bilbo and Frodo.
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