Man at work

The Perfect Job

Beard Face has started looking for a new job and because myself and the other cats in the house are, what you would call, good Samaritans, we’ve decided to help the old boy out. Things got off to a promising start when Charlie found a listing for a temporary lamp post i.e. a person to…

New Career

Beard Face, the buffoon, has only gone and found himself unemployed again. It wasn’t pretty I have to say. An argument in the office, a fierce exchange of words, chairs were thrown and the old boy was hurled head first out of the building. You might be licking your lips in anticipation at the juicy…

Happy Halloween!

It’s official. It’s Halloween. This is the one day in the year where Beard Face can walk the streets at night and not be at risk of being abducted by government officials to undergo extensive testing for a new biological weapon. The only thing remotely weapon like on the old boy’s person is probably the…

Friday the 13th

This morning was a cause for great celebration. That is if you reside in the camp of Charlie. Always willing to force his hand (paw!) and deliver relentless misery on Beard Face, the feline equivalent of Ming the Merciless awoke this morning with a glint in his eye. It’s Friday the 13th, he announced. This…

Frizzy Birthday

We all celebrated Frizzy Hair’s birthday yesterday. It was a grand occasion save the presence of Beard Face. The old boy continued to rain on our most exquisite parade but we would not be beaten in giving Frizzy Hair a truly frizzy birthday. Here’s a list of gifts that we all gave her:- Beard Face…

The Amazing Charlie and His Militarised Rodents

Beard Face has been getting through books at a frightening pace of late. I know what you’re thinking. Beard Face can read! Well, he can to an extent. That’s not how he’s getting through books so quickly though. Like a small child he has the books read to him through downloads from a site called…

Haircut

Beard Face has had the same hairstyle for the last twenty years. I use the word “style” in a very loose sense of course. Usually the old boy wakes up and just combs the mass of hair down without any thought for his own image or with any concern for the physical and mental damage…

The Hobbit

Beard Face was unbearable this week. He’s rented The Hobbit from Lovefilm and has spent about three days building himself up to watching it. When he did finally brave the film it took him two days to get through it. The reason? There are many. First of all, the beard is a big fan of…

Happy Birthday

It was Beard Face’s birthday today so all of us were up bright and early and bellowing, “Happy birthday,” in very loud voices. I tell a lie. We spoke the words so quietly that even a dog couldn’t hear, such was our lack of enthusiasm at honouring the old boy’s advancement of one year. That…

Stand Up

Beard Face and Frizzy Hair are big fans of stand up comedians. Among their favourites are Dara O’Briain, Milton Jones, Miles Jupp and Eddie Izzard. These performers have it all – wit, confidence and style. Why then did Beard Face announce today that he is going to try his hand at being a stand up…

Quantum Leap

Frizzy Hair has introduced Beard Face to the sci-fi series Quantum Leap. Remember that one? It’s about a guy who takes part in an experiment and he ends up time travelling or leaping if you want to be anal about it. Each time he enters a different time period he finds himself in the body…

Fairy Cake

The beard decided to treat himself today. He spent the day thinking about the carbonara ready meal he’d be microwaving later and figured it would be nice to round off such a meal with a fairy cake. Beard Face loves fairy cakes but whenever he eats one he’s disappointed not to find an actual fairy…

Stupidity

Beard Face and Frizzy Hair have become big fans of the American comedian, Bill Maher. I have to say the guy is undoubtedly funny and he’s also intelligent. Maher isn’t afraid to talk about current affairs and criticise whoever he deems to be in the wrong be it in politics, culture, religion etc. One snippet…

The End of the World

Beard Face was up late watching Seeking a Friend for the End of the World. It’s all about the world ending in 3 weeks with no Bruce Willis on hand to stop the approaching asteroid after some cheesy male bonding with Ben Affleck. When it was over the beard sat in contemplation and began to…